Writer's Block

For someone who loves to write and wants to someday make this a full time career, I'm doing a pitiful job at it. Let's just say that I'm having a severe case of writer's block on most days...especially with the blog I write for work. It's been about a month or over a month since I updated that one. I just can't think of anything to write about. That's the hardest part for me...coming up with something to write about. Once I get a topic, I can just write and write with no problem. I wonder if other writers have this problem? I wonder if it's just as hard for them to come up with a topic as it is for me. Of course with this blog I just don't seem to have blog worthy topics to write about.

Last night though, we had our monthly women's meeting at church. It went very well, I think. We are doing The Mayberry Bible Study Vol. 4. Each lesson consists of watching an episode of The Andy Griffith Show and then you discuss it afterwards. It's quite interesting. Each episode is about a certain topic. Last night's study was about values. This is just something fun and light to do until we start our main bible study at the beginning of next year. Our church is also having a fall festival this Saturday. It's always something fun for everyone but it's so much work getting it all together. This year we have had a few problems and glitches so we are thinking of not having it next year and trying something different like Trunk or Treat. It just all depends on how the fall festival goes this Saturday. I'm looking forward to it. Actually, I'm looking forward until it's over. Ha!

It's so beautiful out today. It's what I have been waiting for all summer. It's high of 69 degrees with beautiful blue skies. I think I'm going to go the park and walk on the trail today. It would be just wrong if I didn't.

Changing Seasons

Today I ordered a soundtrack online and the coolest thing was that as soon as I purchased the song it was ready for download! I was so excited. I didn't have to wait a week to receive it in the mail. That's the second time that's happened. A few weeks ago I ordered a song and the seller e-mailed me the mp3 of it and all I had to do was download it and burn it to a CD. If everyone is starting to do this, I will be one happy gal. Of course all these places are still charging the same price which isn't fair since I'm having to use my own CDs but at least I don't have to pay for shipping anymore. So there is always good and bad in everything. Ahh, we are happy but never fully satisfied. That's sounds like a good devotion but I won't go there today. :-)

Nashville has been such a gloomy place these past few days or should I say these past couple weeks. I'm sure you've seen it on the news that this region is getting drenched. It has not stopped raining for days. Luckily it's not a nonstop rain this week like it has been but the sun won't come out which makes everyone's moods not the greatest. I love this type of weather but even I'm tired of not having a sunny day. It looks like fall outside with the leaves changing and the constant cloud cover and rain but it is so humid and muggy and just plain hot! If the weather was cooler than I think everything would be more tolerable. But as I read on someone's Facebook status the other day, "Thank you Lord for the rain. Help us not to complain for when it is hot and dry we will pray for it again." I liked that. It's so true. When it is so dry we pray for rain but when it rains we pray and beg the Lord to take it away. I catch myself doing that with temperatures. When it's blistering hot I pray for winter to come with the cooler weather and then when it's winter I can't wait for summertime to come with the warmer weather. Again, the whole never being fully satisfied thing again. I think part of it is I was raised in Illinois where there is a distinct difference in the seasons. I miss that.

I got exciting news! I have a confirmed date and time for my closing so on November 4, 2009, I will become an official home owner. Does it naturally come with heart palpitations?

I Bless Your Name

Ever feel like everything you do or try to do is wrong and there are people right there always willing to point it out to you at every turn? Yep, that's been me this past week. I've been involved with a certain project (that is not work related) and no matter how hard I try to make it better and make it organized and run smoothly there is someone there to point out all my flaws and get angry with me at every little detail. I know that I can't please everyone and I don't try to but I just get tired of people not letting me be human. It seems like I can't have emotions, feelings, opinions or just plain make mistakes. Every time I have any of the mentioned actions, I get yelled at, snubbed or talked to like I'm a five year old. I just got tired of it so last night I resigned from all positions. Of course, I was told that I need to just think and pray about it but I've made up my mind. I know it sounds like I'm just giving up and quitting and I guess I am but I need a break...from everything. I also think this is what is best for the situation at hand.

I read a blog today about a person dealing alot this summer with fears and frustrations so they spent time out in nature camping and hiking. What is about being out in nature that makes you feel refreshed and renewed and closer to the Lord? That's what I do to renew my spirit with the Lord. There is a trail near my home that I hike when I need to relieve stress and frustration. There's just something about walking through God's creation with no phones, no sirens, no TV that let's you hear God. Without all the distractions you seem to get everything in perspective. Reading this certain blog today reminded me of Psalms 121:1-2. It says, "I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth." These verses were so comforting to me today. I've had so many frustrations, fears and stress lately myself that I felt like I couldn't breathe. But I know through it all the Lord is there beside me helping it through it all.

Thank you, Lord, for being my Rock and Comfort and Help in my times of need. I can't live without You. You are all I need and I bless Your name!

Where Were You?

Do you remember what you were doing eight years ago today? Like everyone in our great country I'm sure you remember exactly where you were and what you were doing. I had been working at the FWB National Home Missions office for exactly one year. I was sitting at my desk working on my computer when my phone rang. It was my mother saying a plane had crashed into one of the towers at the World Trade Center. I really didn't think too much about it. I just figured that it was a tourist plane or something small like that. Then a little bit later she called again saying another plane hit the other tower and then she told me about the other two planes in PA and at the Pentagon. It was so surreal.

Our office turned on the TV and were just astounded at what we were seeing that day. Needless to say not much got done in our office that day. I'm sure not much work got done anywhere that day across our nation. At lunchtime I walked to my car and won't forget the feeling while being outside. The skies were so quiet and it felt so eerie. The sky was a gorgeous deep blue with not a single cloud floating by. It was a beautiful day. Airplanes fly over our building all day long because we are not too far from the airport but not a single plane flew by that day and the silence was deafening...signaling that something terrible was wrong. It was if the world just stopped that day. Of course for the next few hours we were glued to the TV as we watched the towers burn and then tumble to the ground.

I know it's been eight years but when I still stop and think about that day all the same feelings I had that day come back up to the surface.

Today I will remember those whose lives were taken on the horrible day.

Today I will remember the men and women who fought and died protecting our country.

Today I will remember those men and women who are still fighting today for our freedom.

Today I will not forget.

Fearful Sounds

I wandered up the stairs alone with a clear purpose in mind. All other thoughts stripped except for the task at hand. The room was small and stuffy and a fine layer of dust covered every exposed area in the cluttered space. I spot the intended objects of my focus and set about doing what I knew had to be done. Halfway through my task, I hear something that makes me freeze in an instant. After a few moments of listening to the fearful sound, I cautiously and slowly turn my head from one side to the other to try and find the source of this horrifying noise. A noise that has made me so fearful it has caused me to forget about what I was doing in this cramped room and why I was even there in the first place. Realizing that the noise is not coming from around me, I slowly lift my eyes upward and there by the shadeless lightbulb I spot it. The very sight of it has made me go paralyzed and the noise of this creature is deafening. My stomach churns as I stare at this most awful looking beast and I suddenly lose my breath. My lungs automatically scream at me in pain as I try to fill them back up with air that just wouldn't come. Suddenly, by a power greater than my own, my mind clears long enough to remember why I was in this terrifying room. I quickly and quietly finish my task so I don't call attention to this evil looking monster less it comes after me full force and cause excruciating pain. I slowly creep to the edge of the room and quietly but swiftly sneak down the steps and slam the door shut locking in this horrible, terrifying,and grotesque animal. The emotions running through me at this moment were too many to explain. I realize what had just happened and thank God that my life was spared.

To simplify this story...I went up into the attic of the church last night to check all our signage for the Fall Festival coming up and a wasp was flying over my head. It terrified me to death since I have a HUGE fear of wasps...but wasn't that story much more interesting than the simple version?! :)

Houses, Hotels and Revivals...Oh My!

Exciting things have been happening here lately. I have done something that I never thought I would do (or do alone) but I made the step and I purchased my own home. I haven't actually bought it yet. I have signed the contract and will close on it in the middle of November. It's a townhome which I love. I didn't want to have to be responsible for a lot of yard work my first time out so I thought a townhome would be a better route, plus they are a little more affordable than a single family home. It's a new construction home so I'm unbelievably excited that I will be the first one living in this home. It will be move in ready, which is what I was looking for and realized after months of house hunting that there are not too many of those out there. Some people just don't take care of their homes. While house hunting I looked at many HUD homes or foreclosure homes. They were not in the best of conditions and I just don't have the money to fix them back up. My realtor took me to this one home in LaVergne and it was a cute home but the last owners decided to take some things of the house with them like, the bushes, the gutters, the heating/air unit out back, and the kitchen. Yes, the ENTIRE kitchen...stove, fridge, dishwasher, sink, cabinets....everything! Did I mention they also took the gutters!! But they left the satellite dish attached to the house, go figure.

But I'm so excited about this new place. This was the subdivision that I really wanted to be in and it is close, work, church and my parents. I mentioned that it was new construction and that is why I have to wait until November to close...it's still being built! Actually it is built but they are not done with it on the inside. All they have done on the inside is the drywall is up and the ceiling is painted. They also have the floor down in the kitchen and the entry way. They just need to finish the flooring downstairs and upstairs, paint the walls and install the kitchen. I might post pictures but I want to wait until it's finished. I'm so excited but nervous all at the same time. I can't believe I'm a homeowner now.

My weekend went pretty well. I had a terrible migraine on Friday so I had to leave early from work and then later I went house hunting and found my incredible new home! My mom and I got this great offer to spend two nights at the Opryland Hotel. So we went and stayed last night and tonight. It's a little weird staying at a hotel in the town you live in but the hotel is very nice. I remember going to the hotel during college to walk around and take pictures with friends. It is a gorgeous hotel and if you ever come to Nashville it's definitely a place to visit even if you don't stay there. The gardens and waterfalls are absolutely stunning. So after work today I will run home, pick up my mom (who decided to spend the day at home instead of the hotel) and then head back out to the hotel to wander around and enjoy the sights.

This weekend will be pretty busy as well. My brother and his family are coming into town because our church is having a weekend revival and my brother is heading up the music. David Crowe, who is one of the directors where I work, is our evangelist and Chad will be leading the music and handling all our special music. So if you are in the Nashville area and would love to hear some awesome singing and preaching come on over to Rejoice FWB Church. We would love to have you. On Saturday night we are having a banquet for our church members and Aaron Wilburn will be bringing the entertainment. He is a Christian comedian and he is hilarious. I know he used to travel with the Gaither Homecoming crew for a while. David and Aaron have become pretty good friends. They met at a church where David was the evangelist and Aaron was the entertainment. So they've done a few things together like that and we've even used him for one of our retreats that we had in Pigeon Forge. I'm looking forward to it.

Happy Tuesday!

Life Lessons I Learned from Julie & Julia

Last night was such an enjoyable evening. I met a friend for dinner at Cozymel's. I love that place. We always get the table side guacamole. They make it right there at your table. It's very delicious. I've never enjoyed guacamole but she encouraged me one day to try it and I loved it...as long as there is no cilantro in it. That herb doesn't agree with my palate too much. But other than that I do enjoy guacamole. After dinner we went to go see Julie & Julia. This was a very good movie. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I love Meryl Streep. She can just transform into any character where you don't even see her...you see the character only. She sounded and acted just like Julia Child. It was amazing. I learned a few things actually from this movie. *If you haven't seen the movie yet and plan to, you might want to skim through this next part but maybe not. Not sure if I'll give anything important away or not.

My lessons are sixfold.

First of all, I learned that you pat your meat dry. Your meat won't brown well if it still has a wetness to it.

Secondly, Julia Child didn't get married until she was around 40 years old (so I still have hope). She had quite a love affair with her husband. They portrayed their romance very cutely (is that a word) in the movie. It was rumored that she and her husband were spies for the US government and they briefly mentioned it in the movie. It wasn't confirmed or denied in the movie and it was only made in one statement but I thought it was interesting that she was a spy.

Thirdly, I learned that I need more readers for my blog. The character Julie blogged her way through Julia Child's cookbook. She had so many reader and people making comments all the time. Maybe it was because her blog was more of a conceptual blog where mine is just a daily summary of what I have done and what I am going to do with my personal opinions and thoughts thrown in for good measure. What do I need to do to get more readers? Not that I have many interesting things to say that should warrant more readers but it would be nice to know that people are reading my blog and that I'm not just sending it out there into the unknown void of cyberspace.

Fourthly, food looks sooo good on the big screen.

Fifthly, I want to go to France.

The last thing I learned from Julie & Julia is that you never put people on a pedestal or if you do, never plan on meeting them or interacting with them in any way, shape or form. Julie had put Julia on a pedestal to where she created Julia in her mind to be perfect...the perfect wife, friend, and cook. At the end Julie finds out something about Julia that devastates her and with good reason. It broke her heart. (Julia Child was still alive when Julie did her blogging/cooking her way through the cookbook.) Julie thought they had so much in common with being stuck in their lives and that they had this common bond where cooking saved them from themselves and in turn that made them sisters even though they had never met. But Julie ended up being so disappointed because she had made Julia to be this person that she never truly was.

That is the way it is though. You see someone you've never met (i.e. celebrity, missionary, preacher) and you create this perfect person in your head. How many times have you had a deep fascination with a celebrity and then you find out something horrible about them and you are crushed? You can never look at them the same. They weren't the person you had created them to be. But the truth is, no one is perfect. We are all human and have human thoughts. (That's deep, I know!) We all get angry, can be judgmental, say things we shouldn't, and do things and go to places we shouldn't. We should never measure ourselves to someone else or try to emulate them. The only person we should strive to be like or imitate is Jesus Christ. He is the only perfect person and all we need to do is try and be more like Him and in turn He will help us be the type of person He wants us to be for Him.

So thank you, Julia Child and Julie Powell, for reminding me what is important and not to waiver on my goal of being more like our Lord and Savior.

By the way, the movie was excellent and I highly recommend you go see it.

Settlin'

Is it really September 1st? It doesn't seem possible at all! In 10 days is my father's birthday and in 18 days is my sister (in-laws) 30th birthday. I can't believe it's the beginning of Fall already but I sure do love it! This is my favorite time of the year. The time where the air gets a little bit of a crisp to it and where the leaves start to turn to beautiful colors. I think Autumn is God's best work. Well, all God's work is best but there is something different about the Fall season. I always said when I get married I will get married in October. Could there be a better month? I don't really think there could be.

I had a fabulous weekend. Thursday night I went to dinner and a movie with a friend. We went to see the Time Traveler's Wife. It wasn't too bad. It had a few things in it that could have been left out and it was a little sad to me but it was a good movie. Saturday night I went to the Keith Urban/Sugarland concert. It was wonderful, fabulous, and awesome! I have pictures up on my facebook page if you hadn't seen it already. It was wonderful. Sugarland was just outstanding. I wish I could sing like Jennifer Nettles. I think she has one of the best voices out there. At least when she sings on stage (and dancing around) she stays on key...not like other blond country singers out there. :) Keith Urban was just the man. He was so good. I love to hear him talk. This was my first time to see him in person and he did not disappoint. He can play that guitar like no other...well, except for Brad Paisley. I believe he's a little bit better guitarist. But nonetheless, it was an amazing concert.

The highlight might though have been the drunk family sitting next to me. Notice the sarcasm in my typing. It was a couple who looked to be in their late 50's or early 60's and they had two young couples who I guessed were their two children and their significant others. They all came in with a full cup of beer each and before they had finished their glass someone would go make another beer run and fill every one's glasses back up. They had to have had at least three beers a piece before Sugarland (who sang first) were into their third song. At one point the man sitting right next to me spilt his beer all over him and part of my foot. Nice. Then he sang along with both Sugarland AND Keith Urban...badly! I didn't know that I paid to hear two concerts at the same time. They were a weird family and they got weirder the drunker they became. But in their defense, they were a nice family. They always said excuse me when they would pass by with their beer in hand. I hate alcohol! I just loathe it and will never understand why people want to drink or feel like they need it. I hate every aspect of it even if you drink in moderation. There are no excuses for drinking and no purpose. Ugh! Someone told me just this weekend that if you drink in moderation it's okay. What?! Do these people not read the Bible? Do they not read the FWB church covenant?! Ugh! Don't get me started. Also this person said that they don't say anything to people he knows that are drinking because they are a gluten and that's just as wrong. Maybe true but when you overeat you are only hurting yourself and when you drink you can kill an entire family. So don't give me that for not standing up to your principles or not standing up for what the Bible has to say. Whew! I've been holding that in for a little bit. I feel better now.

Anyway, tonight I'm going out with a friend for Mexican and then to see Julie & Julia. We have been wanting to see this for while and its the first time our schedules have cleared for us to meet up and go see it. I'm excited. I love girls night out. But after this, I'm done spending money for awhile. I'm still house hunting and as long as I keep going out to concerts and movies, I'll never be able to afford a house. I guess I need to start prioritizing.

Speaking of houses, Saturday I went to a seminar for a new loan that is out. I'm not going to mention the loan because it is so left-wing and liberal that I'll never endorse the company. But they have the best interest rates and they have this no money down and no closing costs. Then you can buy down your interest rate if you so choose. But if you choose to join up with this lender you have to sign a contract saying that you will participate in 5 acts of community service. These acts include demonstrations and civil disobedience. Uh-huh. Not for me. I am so conservative that there is no way you would see me out on a picket line. They have even gone so far as to throw furniture on bank CEO's and presidents' front lawn. They have busted down their gates before and trampled all over their yards. That's going a little far. The CEO of this lending company has been arrested more times than he can count and he calls himself an "urban terrorist". I don't think so. I am not going to support a company with these gorilla tactics so so I don't have to put money down on a house. It was insane, this seminar. I've realized there are some crazy people in this world.